thankful...

I am following my sister's lead and taking a moment to remember the things in my life that I am thankful for. I am not going to lie, there have been times in the past few months where I have struggled to be thankful. There are times when relationship, wedding, family, life stuff is hard. There are times when I have lost sight of all the things in my life that are amazing and from the Lord. I want to remember them more. I want to be more thankful for the good things in the midst of the hard things.

A few things that I have been thankful for recently:

that my soon-to-be in-laws love the Lord

that the Lord has given my mother and I a truly close friendship

my sister, her family, and that sweet babe growing inside her

honesty

a fiance that works so hard to break through my walls

my little apartment

hot summer weather (even though almost everyone else hates it)

real "i can tell you anything and you will still like me" friendship

for situations only the Lord can change

grace and acceptance

affirmation from my parents

babies

reuniting

oh, and jalapeno burgers from Harris Teeter

what is on your list?

thankful <3 

something good...

i haven’t written anything on here since July 2010. slack much? i think so. :)

so much has happened in my life over the past few days and will be happening over the next few months. i want to try and write about how i am feeling and what’s happening so that one day i can look back at it and remember as much as possible.

getting engaged has been such an amazing experience. there have been so many emotions and so many tears (of joy, of course.) Kyle is the most amazing man i have ever known. he loves me in a way that sometimes i cannot understand. he loves the Lord in a way that inspires me. i would say he is the man of my dreams but honestly he is more than i could have dreamed or dared to.

ever since Kyle got down on his knee in front of his entire family, by the way, (the perfect proposal) Romans 8:28 (MSG) has been running through my mind "we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good." i feel overwhelmed with joy when i think about how God knew that every step would lead me to this moment. that every mistake, every regret, and every stumble would land me in the arms of such an amazing man.

i can honestly say that there was a very big part of me that was unsure if this moment would ever come in my life. i know people say things like that but i genuinely mean it. before falling in love with Kyle i always felt i was so damaged. life has made me hard and independent, not soft and submissive the way a wife should be. i never thought a man could see through all that and into the soft, emotional woman that i am inside. but Kyle does. he really sees me and loves me so well.

i feel so blessed that the Lord worked everything in my life into something oh so good. i am excited to start our life and change my name but right now i am basking in the wonderful joy i feel at this moment.

and to top it all off, he is unbelievably handsome.